According to a survey conducted by Adoptive Families magazine, between 2015 and 2016, domestic (United States) newborn adoptions cost an average of $37,000 and international adoptions averaged about $42,000. The cost of adoption in Maryland ranges from $20,000 to $50,000.
I am Dean Kirschner. Why "Libby's Corner?" This blog, actually, all of Adoption Makes Family, is a tribute to my mother who brought adoption to our family in 1956 when my older sister was adopted.
When my mother died in 1967, she left a legacy of love for children that transcended any biological connection. Having been only 8 years old at the time of her death, I do not recall hearing specific words about adoption from my mother. However, through the years, having many conversations with her friends and our family, I have learned so much about my mother's feelings toward children, toward adoption.
Personally, the experience of adoption has been in my life since my own birth. I'm the little brother of an older sister who was adopted at birth. Adoption was never a big deal in our family. We were all treated the same. Biologically conceived by our parents or adopted, there was never a sense for me that we were loved any differently.
I remember at my first home study meeting in preparation to adopt my first son. The social worker asked if I had any personal experience with adoption. My first reaction was a sense of connection. I lived with adoption all my life. I embrace adoption. Now, I am the father of two boys, both adopted.
Every day I realize how much I love my sons. I laugh with my sons. I play with my sons. I parent my sons. Some days there are frustrations. More days, there are fun and joyful times with my sons. Some days, I have had to be a disciplinarian. More days, I am the supporter, the advocate, the fixer, the helper, the confidant, the teacher, the guide, the safety net, the protector. To sum it up, I'm Dad.
My sons are adopted, yet we don't hold that term as a distinction of difference. We celebrate adoption as a means by which I became Dad and they became my children. When I introduce my sons, I introduce them as my sons. Introduce my sister as my sister. The stories of how we became a family are amazingly wonderful. We share our adoption stories proudly. The adoption stories speak to the excitement of becoming a sister, a brother, a son, a grandson, a cousin, a nephew.
I have spoken with my sister and my sons about their feelings about their birth parents and the adoption. No one has forgotten that they were adopted, because adoption is an open conversation in our family. However, there is no angst about adoption. We answer questions honestly and allow complete and open discussions about birth parents and their adoption story. There are no mysteries or secrets. There are stories of love, excitement and family.
As for how we get along as siblings, my sister and I have our disagreements. More often, we have our agreements. We have fought, loved, laughed, played. We are just normal siblings. I don't feel adoption plays into our relationship. We have had wonderful discussions about adoption and birth parents. However, when it comes down to just being brother and sister, we are just that. Brother and sister. My sister has actively reached out and chatted with birth mothers who have created an adoption plan with Adoption Makes Family.
My sons have the same type of relationship. They love like brothers. They fight like brothers. They protect each other and look out for each other. They are not biologically related. They are related through adoption. But, above all, they are brothers.
And so, I turn back to my mother, Libby. I learned from my mother the unconditional love for children. Starting in her own little corner of our family, she shaped me, my sister, my sons and our world. Hopefully, this blog, Libby's Corner, can do the same for you.
Do I Need an Adoption Agency?
Whether you are a birth mother interested in creating an adoption plan or an adoptive family interested in adoption, you undoubtedly have a million questions running through your mind. One that we hear quite often is, “Do I need an adoption agency?”
How Do I Adopt a Baby in Maryland?
To some hopeful families, the unknowns of adoption can be overwhelming. There are numerous questions running through their minds. How do I adopt a baby in Maryland?
How to Deal With an Uncooperative Birth Father Who Disagrees With the Adoption Plan
Creating an adoption plan can be an incredibly difficult and emotionally draining experience for a birth mother. Dealing with an uncooperative birth father certainly doesn’t make things any easier.
Can Biological Parents Regain Custody After Adoption?
One of the questions we hear fairly regularly from hopeful adoptive parents is, “Can biological parents regain custody after adoption?”
Talking About Adoption With Friends and Family – Adoptive Parents
“Whether you have already adopted or are in the process of adopting or are placing a child, your family and friends may have a lot of questions,” writes Lita Jordan, adoptive mother. Talking about adoption with friends and family members can, at times, be difficult.
How Do I Talk to My Child About Adoption?
There comes a time in every adoptive parent’s life when they ask themselves a very simple question. How do I talk to my child about adoption? It can be a difficult conversation for a parent to start, but it is an incredibly important conversation to have.
How Do I Adopt in Maryland?
If you’ve thought about adopting a child, chances are that you’ve also asked yourself the question, “How do I adopt in Maryland?”
Coping with Life After Adoption
Choosing to create an adoption plan is one of the toughest decisions a mother will ever make. Many struggle coping with life after adoption.
How Will Adoption Affect My Baby?
When grappling with the difficult decision to create an adoption plan, one of the questions we hear pretty regularly is “How will adoption affect my baby?